Friday, May 11, 2012

Colonoscopy time again - eeekkkk!

I hate the thought of having to have a colonoscopy and that time has just come around again!  July 26th to be precise.

The thought of the prep fills me with trepidation.  How long will it take to work? Then the constant back and forth to the bathroom!

I'm scared up to the point when they are just about to put you to sleep and then the fear of the results when you wake up.

Last came I came around, I saw my GI immediately and shouted across the room at her.."Do I have cancer?"...I couldn't help myself and up until that very point in time, I hadn't realised how scared I was.

This time around I feel even more scared about the results.  I fear the worst as thing have been 'normal' lately.  Good things always come to an end. 

Yes, sorry, I'm pretty negative about my future at the moment and I have no reason to be.

The power of positive thinking goes out the window in the lead up to the hospital visit.  

Any ideas on how to lift this dark cloud?


  1. Paula,

    Good luck with your colonoscopy! This is funny I read your post at this exact moment. I just did a post on positive thinking and how important it is for us who have UC to try and have. It is hard, I completely know exactly what you are going through. You fear the worst... you fear the unknown. But if everything has been going good and you haven't had any bleeding then you have every reason to be positive and to think everything will still be the same if not better than before. Take a deep breath... everything is going to be okay. Now as for the prep of your colonoscopy... I have no positive words to say about that. It's hell... I know!!!!

    1. Well you know my views on the subject. I found Hypnotherapy very helpful, and although I was still scared I wasn't as scared as before, and although it hurt I could deal with it. Not even sedatives - awake throughout. Able to get dressed and walk away. . . . Well in a slightly odd way of course :)

  2. Positive thinking is a tricky business and I wish I had some advice on the subject. I'm just so happy that you're doing well lately. Take some time every day to smell the roses and enjoy your 'normal.' As for the scope D: those things are the worst and there's no denying it! But I have to agree with Jodi that since you're 'normal' right now there is less reason to worry. Hang in there.

  3. Hey, How did it go?
    Hope you are OK

  4. It went well..I just posted a blog...I was so scared about this one...turns out I wasted a heap of time on negative thoughts....but I just couldn't shift them this time....'s the Olympic fever going in good old Blighty....the time difference between here and there is too much to watch finals and I'm rubbish about getting up at 4am ....bummer.... :D